Self sabotage is a tricky beast. It can show up in a myriad of little ways and some not so little ways.
Self sabotage is often our inner child’s way of keeping us safe from perceived dangers. The trouble is that what was dangerous to our inner child is probably perfectly okay for us as an adult.
When we were little we often hoped and prayed that the teacher wouldn’t call on us in class. We hoped that we could sneak an extra biscuit without our parents catching us. We just wanted to be invisible or blend into the wallpaper – for whatever reason. So our inner child does a good job of remembering all of those times that we tried to hide ourselves, those times when we decided it was not safe to be seen. In its own way, our inner child is still trying to keep us safe from whatever it sees as being dangerous.
The thing is that we aren’t five3 years old any more. We aren’t worried about the teacher calling on us the answer the questions any more. We aren’t hiding from any one but we also aren’t showing up in our own lives as fully as we should either.
We are letting our inner child rule the roost. We are letting our inner child tell us “No, don’t put yourself out there its not safe. No, don’t show up as your authentic self you’ll get hurt. No, best you stay here with me” Then we wonder why our soul mate can’t find us or we get passed over for promotion or why we don’t get the amount of clients that we want.
We start to feel invisible and wonder why that is.
The answer is simple – our inner child is helping us stay hidden.
It isn’t doing it to hurt us or to hold us back, although those are side effects. No our inner child is doing what it sees as its job – keeping us safe. What was “dangerous” to us when we were 5 is a totally different story to when we are 35 or 45. We grow up but our inner child stays stuck in the first few years of our life. You see our subconscious mind is what governs our inner child and that got formed waaaay back before we were 7 ( yes, really).
Think of your subconscious mind as the default settings on your computer. It is the programming that we came in with and (good news!) we can change it.
Bob Proctor says that there are only two ways to change your subconscious beliefs
(1) A near death experience or diagnosis of life threatening illness
(2) Constant evenly, spaced repetition.
Which option are you going to pick?
I know which one sounds easier and doable.
This is why I love EFT (tapping). With EFT we can uncover those old memories and patterns and start shifting your mindset to one that serves you and works in your favor.
If you think visibility is one of the ways self sabotage is holding you back or you want to be more visible in your life then now is a good time to book in for a session with me.